Know When to Say "When"

I am getting married on October 10th of this year.
As a writer, it is driving me insane.

Why? Am I afraid of losing my personal identity by legally and spiritually weaving my life into that of another? Is it because of conflict due to the ceremony itself? Do I hate wedding cake and it is completely throwing off my writer's chi?

No.
It is a simple matter of time.

Time was not so important when I was a child. As I grew into a teenager, it began to become a significant factor in life. I had to get to school, class, and work on time. It was different then though, living at home I had family to help.

I had my mom to run in to my room screaming about the bus coming in fifteen minutes. I also had fewer responsibilities so fewer things monopolized my time. Even as I neared the age of twenty, I thought I knew what older adults meant when they talked about not having any of the elusive commodity called time.

Today, I fully understand what they were talking about. It has become a strenuous task to balance work, personal life, and the household. It would not be quite so bad if it was not for the wedding planning thrown into the mix. Did I also mention just about everyone else I know is getting married as well? All summer, a weekend has not gone by without one shower or ceremony and reception to attend.

I suppose, in a way, my marital bliss is the reason my writing has been put on hold. This has brought me to a conclusion. Please feel free to disagree, I come to this as a result of my own experiences. If you have some magical or infallible way to make more time, by all means, please share.

I have come to the conclusion that sometimes, there is no way to balance it all. You simply cannot do it. Even if you wake up each morning at 5 or 6 am and plan out each day, there will be conflicts not to mention distracting stress. My solution to all this is to eliminate something. Not permanently of course, but it makes complete sense to me.

My wedding planning will be done, come hell or high water, on October 10th. I know this, it is a solid date and not far off. Much as I dislike the idea, it seems logical that my personal writing must be set aside for now until I can return to it with the time it deserves. It seems silly for me to put in a few minutes here or there, while my mind is elsewhere and the work will not be given the attention it should. Rather than trying to be miss perfect planner, I feel like I have to compromise with myself.

Go ahead, call me a slacker or failure or whatever you like. This just works best for me. Rather than tumbling through the next month pulling my hair out, I would rather simply put the personal work on hold. I will still be freelance writing (it is a must, after all, a wedding will not pay for itself) however my novel and other personal projects will simply have to wait.

I do not write this for any kind of reassurance. My decision is made regardless of what anyone else thinks. However, I write this for others who may have fallen into this trap as well. Life throws things at you, and sometimes you do not have enough hands to hold it all. Rather than letting things, like your sanity, fall on the floor and shatter, compromise. Everyone has a sturdy shelf, so take one or two of the things that can wait, and put them up there. I cannot speak for anyone else, but I promise I will not view you as less of a writer, or whatever you may be.

The most important part is to remember that it is alright to say you have been defeated by time. It is ok to put a few things aside, things that can wait and will still be there when you are ready for them, provided you remember to remember them. Know when to say when, but do not forget to pick them back up off the shelf when the time devouring-storm has weakened.

The Longest Journey

The path to author-dom has proven to be a long and winding one. Although this does not come as a surprise, even the most cursory look into the world of publishing reveals long deadlines and grueling response times. Still, as a hopeful newcomer, no amount of preparation seems to be enough to fully grasp the intensity of these waiting periods.

Queries go out, rejections come in. I have received a few myself. However, today one glimmer of hope appeared. An agent requesting a partial manuscript. In the back of my mind, I know that this will quite possibly amount to another rejection. Yet, I also realize that this is the farthest I have traveled on the author road at this point. It is nearly invigorating. I have peaked someone's curiosity. Even if it only adds to my list of rejections, it means I have inched forward.

I am no expert...yet. However, I have found keeping busy helps pass the time, just be careful to not over do it. They say as soon as you begin querying for one novel, you should start writing the next. Otherwise, the waiting and agonizing could prove fatal to your perseverance, and later, your writing career. I believe this to be true, but I also want to issue a word of warning. Make sure you are setting aside enough time to follow up and continue sending queries every so often, or your project may stagnate.

For a while now, I have been building up my freelance writing career. I currently handle a number of projects for a variety of clients. These pay, and I am very happy to have the work. The problem is, my long term goal is to become a published novelist. For a few weeks now, I allowed my paying jobs to eclipse my dream. This is a mistake I do not plan to repeat. Sure, the time passed by quickly. I have felt rather overwhelmed by the amount of work. Focus is important, though, and for a little while I lost mine. Today, I adjusted my sight so that my focus is back on track.

Perhaps the request for a partial was fate giving me a little hint. I started querying again, and within an hour I had a response that I had not received before. Even if it ends in a polite "no", I have found my motivation, which I had no idea I lost until today.

Hopefully, I will come to follow this road over and over again in the future. At that point, it may become routine. For now, I will enjoy the new excitement of it all. Something akin to going on your first date or moving into your first apartment. Eventually you will move, or date other people, and in this case, possibly write other books. The first time is special, though. I hope that one day I can look back and fondly remember my first clumsy steps that eventually carried me to where I want to be.

The Weight Of Words

As a writer, I have learned value of properly used words. You can state something with whatever tone you like based on the words you choose. A single meaning can be linked to multiple words, each with it's own nuance and level of severity.

For example, is my character mildly annoyed, angry, or is he enraged?

Each emotion varies by degrees and, when used properly, can paint a picture of your character's emotions and personality.

Each character can be seen with important points, that are varying distances from each other, depending on how each relates. These points of personality make up the characters values and morals. What connects them are the emotions and reactions in between.

Picture a connect-the-dots style puzzle, however instead of lines, a writer is using words. Misused words will weaken the strength and believability a character possesses. A generally jovial and pleasant character would not have an angry outburst at something for no reason, unless it plays up to one of those stronger personality points. Consistency is important, even if the character is irrational in their behaviors. They should not suddenly become rational without explanation. I stress the explanation part, because characters grow and change as real people do, but the overall shape of that character should reflect this. While that character may not stay jovial the entire way through, we should have some inkling as to why.

Another misconception I have discovered is that writers have the dictionary memorized. Maybe some do, but I certainly do not. Sure, reading and writing gives us a wider vocabulary to choose from, but we are not born with these words in our heads. We had to go out and learn them, just the same as the next potential writer.

In real life, no one is perfect and we do not always make the best word choices in daily conversation. As writer's though, time is on our side to some degree. We have the chance to rethink and reword, and explore other options. Just as long as we keep the flow of dialogue natural.

Words can be worth their weight, or perhaps their letters, in gold. Writers are given the gift of revision so that we may choose our words wisely. I plan to take full advantage of that gift. In the meantime, my speaking will probably remained flawed, but hopefully my character's speaking will not.

A Word A Day Keeps Procrastination Away

"You mean you sit around and write all day? Is that even a real job?"

Wow misconceptions can be amusing, don't you agree?

For a while I avoided discussing what I did during the day with people. Some do not understand that writing is a real profession and requires real dedication. Even I had some idea of that when I decided to dive head first into the undertaking.

However I now am not sure I truly realized just how demanding of a job it can be. Do not get me wrong, I love it! But I have felt overwhelmed at times.

You have to really work at it to bring home any bacon when starting out. You are entering into a world of scrutiny and, at times, biased attitudes. It is very intimidating for someone "new," such as myself, who is trying to break in with little or no credit to their name. But I have found one tool extremely helpful.

What tool you ask? Is it some new software that writes for you? Some kind of editing program? Maybe a service that coaches you along? Nope.

My favorite tool is a schedule. However you decide to plan your days is up to you, jot notes down on a calendar, keep a day planner or simply make a "to do" list. No matter which you prefer, it is one of the most valuable tools at your disposal.

I admit I am still learning much but I have found that you can not achieve anything if you do not get things done. And I think we all know our faults. I am not among the rare few who can hop out of bed early each morning, alert and ready to work, who knows exactly what needs to be done and gets right to it.

I don't like to get out of bed early, I don't always feel like writing. My mind wanders and things distract me. Entertaining and easier tasks tend to be the most attractive and get done first while the harder more taxing ones get pushed to the side and accumulate. Scheduling prevents this.

If you ask me, just take it one day at a time. Every morning I write out my to do list. If I feel particularly overburdened I may also write one for the following day, jotting down my "overflow" tasks.

I try to break things up a bit too. Obviously items with a hard deadline are top priority. Other writing tasks or more mundane tasks I use as flexible space fillers. I still get them done, but I make sure the important items are not overlooked.

This does a lot more than make me feel productive. I find that I have learned a lot about time required to accomplish certain writing-related things. Such as roughly how long would it take me to write an article that is X number of words. Or how long does it take for me to do enough research necessary to obtain information on a topic. Yes, this always varies. Some projects are far more involved than others, however this gives me a starting point. And it makes my planning more efficient. I will know if an hour is not enough time or if three hours is way too much.

It also keeps me writing. By following my list I am forcing myself to exercise my mind and my words per minute, because inevitably I must do what is on my list. It is also a stress reliever, knowing that any tasks containing deadlines get done right away. I no longer have the anxiety that comes with procrastination.

Everyone's situation is different. In my case, I am planning a wedding and taking care of my household while honing my writing skills and searching for freelance jobs. Oh and working on editing and querying my novel as well. I still feel overwhelmed at times, but it's minimal and easy to deal with since I began using "to do" lists. It does not have to be anything fancy either, I just jot down a list on a scrap paper, mark the priority items and cross them off as I complete them.

So for the time being I feel I have beaten another deadly foe in the game of writing.
Bring it on Procrastination!
Do your worst!

The Concept Reservoir:Jump in, the Water's Fine!

The idea of writing conjures up images of a studious individual slouched over their desk, glasses on as their fist rabidly scribbles on a page or paws at a keyboard.

Surely every writer merely sits before their workspace and lets the ideas pour in like lemon aid from a pitcher. The paper is the glass and the words the lemony sweet liquid we so thirstily gulp down.

If there is one thing I have learned it is that this is not always the case. A writer is constantly thinking. They comb the world before them for inspiration even after they have stepped away from the desk.

We must go out and find our idea wells. Our "concept reservoir" that provides us with our richest, strongest plots. Without new sights and sounds, the well would run dry. The writer who stays only at their desk will surely suffer a drought eventually.

I don't think a writer becomes such the same way a plumber or programmer takes up their trades. I think that to become a true writer, at least a fiction writer, you have to live the career. Your mind becomes a machine, extracting all the world presents then pushing it through the refining cogs of perception and emotion. Sometimes many parts must be pushed through for a coherent idea to emerge.

So where does this happen? Everywhere and anywhere. If there is motivation there will be a writer with a revelation.


Jerry Seinfeld jots down an idea he can not read in the morning.
Oddly enough I have found that the shower seems to be my thinking ground. I can not explain why. Is it the primal nakedness? The cleansing water washing down? Is it the tomb-like walls that surround as barriers from the world, allowing my mind to flourish? Maybe it is the pure lack of distraction?

Whatever it is, I have had some of my strongest concepts hit me as I bathed.

However there is a process here. I can feel the thoughts budding, a flash of an image that reappears consistently in my mind. Or the hint of a word or sentence that builds on itself.

I suppose the lesson I am taking away from this is always have a pen handy for when those overpowering ideas hit. Also, take many showers, because idea's seem to love the water!